From Ashes and Twigs Come Hope

I'm a little tuckered out right now after the roller coaster of emotions associated with proposition 8. I really shouldn't be rolled around by these things anymore as the religious right has been throwing these propsitions at us for years without end. I ought to be numb by now but somehow it always hurts a bit knowing that there are strangers who would be so quick to judge us without having even met us. Of course, they don't deserve the satisfaction of causing us grief. They've caused enough mischief for one election year without us giving them any more benefit to their misdeeds.

The flower in this picture is from Mission Gorge Park. It signifies rebirth of hope out of the dry, seemingly lifeless twigs that the delicate flowers faithfully burst forth from each year. Life, you see, goes on and we are but a blink of an eye in the cosmos. Sometimes, it's best not to take ourselves and our politics too seriously. At least, not until the next battle, for it will surely come.

Not Over Until It's Over

The lead that Proposition 8 gained in the generally poorer, less educated, farming focused inland counties eroded last night. We're now at 52% for proposition 8 and 48% against proposition 8. They're still counting ballots from the richer, more educated coastal areas and mail in ballots. It seems unlikely to be enough to overcome two more percentage points but hope runs Eternal.

Still, if there is hope, it is in the overwhelming support of the legal profession, the teaching profession, actors and actresses, sports stars and other highly visible segments of the population. There is hope in the huge amounts of money we were able to raise in defense of our rights. There is hope in a new openness and activism of not just gays and lesbians but of substantial allies. There is hope in the resounding victories of Democrats in political office everywhere. The battle has just begun and the tide will reveal the truth, that discrimination is not right no matter what religious garb you dress it in.

If there is one big disappointment for me, it is the willingness of the Mormon and Catholic Church to throw millions of dollars at a battle to perpetuate discrimination at a time when our economy is in the trenches, at a time when there are far too many worthy people and families going hungry and unemployed, especially in those same poor uneducated areas that most supported Proposition 8. These people do not need messages of hate, they need food, jobs and education. I ask the Church where the mission of charity has gone and when it was replaced by one of hate and vindictiveness, by one of separation and the politics of self-justification. The Church has wandered from her mission of hope, service and salvation. Let us hope that she finds her way back before it is too late, lest final judgment find her sorely lacking.

The Polls Have Closed

The polls have closed. The results are rolling in. Senator John McCain has conceded and we have a new president elect, Barak Obama. The vote is going strongly Democrat and the Democrats are likely to hold a healthy majority in both houses of Congress. This is a huge repudiation of the policies of the current administration and a strong comment by the people of this nation on the adverse state of the economy and of our international policy. It provides hope that sometimes the people can see beyond the divisive strategies used by the Repulicans and can rise up for something different.

On the other hand, the very misleading advertising on the pro-proposition 8 campaign has, with a minority of districts reporting, been effective with proposition 8 in the lead, 54% to 46%. The news does not say which districts reported so far. Overall, the stance on proposition 8 has been heavily biased by district with rural districts being generally pro-prop. 8 and urban and city districts being generally against prop. 8. Overall, this one will probably not be decided until late into the night.

Of course, prosition or not, the bigotry will not stop overnight. The vitriol behind this proposition proves that discrimination is alive and well in Amercia, even in California. Still, there is hope to be found in the amazing degree of support for the gay and lesbian community shown by our political and corporate leaders in one of the most expensive proposition-related political campaigns in U.S. history. There is hope in the support shown by our youth voters and by our educated and professional classes. There is hope in the strong Democrat majority in the State and in Congress. There is hope in the growing awareness of gay and lesbian issues. This proposition will be a nail biter into the night but perhaps the real battle is being fought every day as we make people aware of the bigotry and injustice faced by gays and lesbians. Progress is slow and always hard won but I can atest that, even in my lifetime, attitudes have changed dramatically and proposition or not, that march towards equality will continue.

Stand Up and Be Counted

Life has come relatively easy for me. I have awesome parents who love all of us kids till the ends of the Earth. I've done well in school and in business. Oh, sure, it is always easy to look at what more I could be, richer, smarter, more athletic, more, more, more. That's the American way, I suppose. Still, all in all, I've been a pretty lucky little guy.

It's easy to take what I have for granted. After all, it just is. Sure, there was hard work involved but that was then. Now is now. However, I also realize that what I have was built upon the backs of those who sacrificed for me to have the life I have today. My grandparents and parents who toiled long, scrimped and saved that their children and grandchildren might have better lives. The teachers and other signficant people who saw promise and pushed me along. Even so far as our founding fathers who created this great country at great risk to their personal lives.

When we look to the rights of gays and lesbians in this country, it is no different. From the brave souls at Stonewall who risked arrest to protest harassment by the establishment to the many volunteers who spend their lives to push for greater rights, both legally and politically, all of them have stepped up to be counted.

Ironically, those who perished of AIDS, also stepped up and were counted. They did not die in vain. That singular tragic disease did more to push gays and lesbians into visible society than perhaps any other event. There, in the early eighties, when our friends, our celebrities (like Rock Hudson) and those we cared about started to die, that was the point where gays and lesbians suddenly and palpably became acutely visible to society. Even more than that, gays and lesbians were all among us: our relatives, our heros, our friends - the people that we cared about. Perhaps it was that very ability to live in hiding, that fed the disease in the first place.

No matter. Hiding has taken too many. From those who died of AIDS to the children who commit suicide rather than face a world where people hate you for something you can hide but cannot not change. There are few other minorities where people you care about may spout hateful, bigoted thoughts right to your face, not knowing that they knifed you with every word, for they did not know.

It's got to stop somewhere. Enough have died. Enough have suffered. That we are even having the debate over whether gays and lesbians can marry shows great promise and progress. That we are even having the debate, shows how far we have come. That we are having the debate shows how much further we must go.

Stop the hate. Vote no on Proposition 8 and stand up and be counted.

Is Prop 8 about Kids?

I was reading a blog post where blogger-Jeff says that prop. 8 is about allowing children the right to choose heterosexual parents. Unfortunately, children generally don't choose their parents, particularly when they're products of a natural childbirth versus an adoption (where sometimtes they have a choice). However, if we look at what children get to choose we just end up with more questions such as: Can single people adopt children? Does a child have a right to parents that plan for his/her well being? Does a child have a right to parents of means that can support him/her? Does a child have a right to choose his/her own religion and not be forced into the religion of his/her parents? Overall, if we all truly cared about child welfare, there would be mandatory classes and certification required before people could have children. Most parents do the best they know how but we can do so much better. I have seen abused, neglected children and they have always been products of unhappy heterosexual marriages. In fact, studies suggest that kids with gay or lesbian parents are better adjusted and better cared for on the average, likely because gays and lesbians can't just have sex and have children (i.e., there are no accidents) but rather have to plan for them and truly want them.

Of course blogger Jeff is totally missing the point about proposition 8 and reasons for or against denying/allowing gay marriage. In adoptions, social services investigates and educates parents long and hard before they let them adopt to make sure they are qualified. Gay marriage doesn't miraculously let gays and lesbians adopt willy nilly. Gay marriage allows committed gay and lesbian couples access to civil rights and responsibilities such as hospital visitation, inheritance rights, joint filing of taxes and other secular rights and responsibilities. I suspect that gay marriage will encourage more responsible long term relationships and productive engagement in society by gays and lesbians. It will also, ironically, result in them being subject to the same marriage tax penalty which means they will pay more taxes into society. What's not to want (for the rest of society)?

Remember, Marriage is about committed couples living stable, productive lives together. Children are a product of some marriages but many couples choose to never have children. I suspect most gay couples will think long and hard before taking on such a great responsibility, especially considering the ongoing discrimination in American society against gay and lesbian couples.

Overall, I think gay marriage offers both fiscal and social benefits for society in the form of more stable, productive couples contributing taxes and resources. If you believe likewise, vote no on 8.